Water 'Bara

Survey Results:
What do you think of pet clothes?
1) ZOMG! What are you thinking? Never! (6 14%)
2) I can see Halloween but nothing else. (1 2%)
3) Once in a whil is okay, as long as no one gets hurt. (29 69%)
4) I don't see why pets shouldn't have to wear clothes if people do. (5 11%)
5) Good point. I'm a nudist and so are my animals. (1 2%)

42 Votes Total
( I have reason to believe that the so-called nudist was lying.)

Me in the clean water of the pool.
I love floating in an innertube before I bite a hole in it.

If you know me or any of my kind, then you'll know capybaras love the water. What you might not know is that we like our water thick, the thicker the better. Sure, I'll swim in clean water when I have to, but mud is what I really want. Lately it's been hard to come by.

I remember way back when I was a baby that there used to be mud everywhere. Water actually fell from the sky. It formed little pools called puddles on the ground. I made my own mud by just rolling in those puddles and using my body to mix the water with the dirt. But then the sky dried up and so did the puddles. The last ones to go were at the bottom of the little creek that runs across our property. One day I ran out there with my owner in tow, all excited about playing in the mud and it was gone! That was the last I saw of it except a few feeble puddles my owner made for me last summer.

But something good happened last week. It got really cold and windy and water fell from the sky again! I didn't know what to think. It had been so long that when my owner let me out to graze, I just stood there in shock. It wasn't until the next day that I realized what had happened. Sadly, the "rain" quickly dried up and I only got to play in the mud a little before it was gone. In fact, I only tracked it into the house one time. What a waste. I'm going to work on that.

Getting ready to make me some MUD!

Then last weekend my owner and Sheldon and Coral and Carl all took me out to the creek. You can imagine my surprise when I saw puddles at the bottom! I had actually forgotten all about how the creek bed stores water like a swimming pool. In this case a swimming pool with a leaky bottom made out of mud, otherwise known as capybara heaven. Let me tell you, I made some fantastic mud. I smeared it all over my body. I dug my toes into it. I rubbed it on my face. It felt great. What a delightful future I envisioned for myself with those puddles.

I have found the thing I am best at.

When my owner took me back the next day, I was stunned. The puddle had lost over half its volume. Nooooo! I tried not to think about it as I played but it was hard. The next day the puddle was gone. The life of a capybara is so hard.

Capybaras are semi-aquatic because mud is semi-aquatic.

And then it rained again! Now that took me by surprise. Does this rain thing happen very often? Why don't I remember it from last year? Is it going to happen again soon? My puddles are back but they're pretty small. I'd feel better if I knew the would be replenished. My owner watches this thing called "The Weather" on TV. I think I might start watching it too.

Shaking off a bit of excess water.

Circle of Humiliation

As you can imagine, it is difficult for a capybara to fit in with a human family. Don’t get me wrong, I love my family, but they are sometimes quite a trial.

This week my owner decided to bring up the whole “Do a Circle” trick again. She found this a long time ago on YouTube. In that video (Minipan Circling) a girl is teaching her guinea pig, Minipan, how to do the circle trick. The circle trick is just what it sounds like, the poor, starving pet is forced to spin around in a full 360-degree circle to get some tiny morsel.

My owner decided it would be cute if I did that trick. Well, I wasn’t having any of it. I pretended I had no idea what she was talking about and just kept looking at her with my dark, featureless but pleading eyes. Eventually she gave up on the idea and we all breathed a sigh of relief, especially me.

But I’ll tell you something, she spends way too much time on YouTube. Eventually she came across this video (Zoo Capybara Circling) showing a zoo capybara in Japan that knew the circle trick! Can you believe a capybara would stoop to that? Well, zoo capybaras are desperate animals and are just dying for treats--I mean attention. That video set my owner off again.

A couple of days ago she got me in the kitchen with a popsicle, which is my current favorite food (outside of yogurt). I stood on my hind legs and begged (I know, not very dignified!). I waved. I did my tap-a-tap-a trick. Nothing happened. She wouldn’t give me the popsicle! Instead she held it over to the side of my head and kept repeating some gibberish. I looked at it with hungry eyes and reached to grab it but she moved it farther away.

Let me tell you, I’m no dummy. I knew her evil plan. But what could I do? I wanted that popsicle. So I turned a little. She moved it again. I turned some more. She moved it more. This went on and on until I was all the way back to facing her and then she finally gave me a bite. It tasted delicious. Maybe even more delicious because I had to work for it. But then again, maybe not.

She kept doing that for every single bite of the popsicle. Eventually I gave up and just did the danged turn when she waved the popsicle. It’s faster that way and I don’t have a lot of patience.

Later in the day, we had a repeat of the same stupid procedure. For every bite I had to turn a full circle. By the third popsicle, I’d given up and didn’t even pretend not to know what she was talking about.

The next day proved more of the same, only this time I had to turn clockwise rather than counter clockwise. I sadly confess that I didn’t put up much of a fight. It only took two popsicles to convince me I’d have to turn that way too if I wanted that popsicle.

So there you have it. A sad story of desperation, deprivation and humiliation. You can view the whole thing on YouTube at: Caplin Rous Circling.

Don’t hate me for what I’ve become...

A more dignified way to ask for a popsicle. Ah for the good old days.

Me forced to circle to get a bite.

Introducing Caplin Rous

Hi! Welcome to my blog. This is my first entry so let me tell you a little bit about myself.

I am not new to the internet. When I was a baby, my owner wrote a weekly column for the San Marcos Daily Press. She posted her articles on blogger under the username Typpy. They’re still there so if you want to see some of her early reflections on what it’s like to keep a capybara, you can look at her blog.

I’ve been on MySpace since I was just a capy-kitten. About six months ago, I joined FaceBook. And now I even have a store featuring me on CafePress. But my biggest internet footprint is on YouTube (www.YouTube.com/CaplinCapybara). My owner has been putting videos of me up there since day one.

Day one was actually day eleven for me. That’s how old I was when my owner got me. But that brings me to my “25 Fascinating Facts About Me!” I wrote this for my MySpace blog but it seems like a good place to start here. Just a little background information.

1. I was one of five capy-kittens but by the time my owner came to claim me, all my siblings were gone. I think maybe I was the runt of the litter.

2. I have four toes on my front feet but only three on my back. They are all webbed except the little one on my front feet. And they have big claws that look like incipient hooves. Those claws really hurt if I step on you, which I have no compunction about doing.

3. My parents were carnies. Their owners take them around to small fairs and carnivals where they are book as "The World's Largest Rats!" I am proud of my carnie heritage but capybaras are NOT rats (not that there's anything wrong with that).

4. I don't like walking on slick, hard surfaces. When I do, I curl my toes just like I would in the swamp, only instead of making it easier, it just makes me slide around.

5. My favorite food is yogurt, specifically blueberry yogurt. When I eat it I get it all over my nose and chin and then it drips on the floor. My owner always tries to clean my face with a sponge but I don't like that so I resist and try to run away.

6. I like to sleep under the covers. But I wake up hungry around 4:00 am and then I pester my owner and/or Rick by eeping and pushing my nose in their faces trying to get them to give me treats. I really want yogurt but for some reason they don't want to give it to me at that time.

7. I like to take a warm bath when the weather is cold. In the morning, I take one while my owner gets ready for work. She has a TV in the bathroom so she can watch the news while I soak. When she leaves the bathroom, I leave too, and it's always too soon. I could stay in the bath for hours!

8. I always poop in the water. My owner has a water bowl set up for me next to the toilet in the little bathroom. The bowl is kind-of small for me now, I barely fit in, so sometimes I miss a little.

9. Coral and Carl are staying with us now and I like to chase them down the hall. It's not that I don't like them, but they never spend any time with me. They don't pet me or feed me treats or scratch my stomach. And they use my bathroom, which I don't like sharing.

10. Coral and Carl have a guinea pig named Neptune and he is my new best friend. I still miss The Rabbit a lot but Neptune helps fill the void.

11. I have my own store at www.CafePress.com. My owner is its best customer.

12. I mostly swim underwater. Unlike humans, I can close my ears and my nose when I swim so I don't get water in them. I swim with my eyes open. Experts say capybaras can hold their breath for five minutes. I never go more than about 30 seconds.

13. I like to lie on the table in my pool and have people feed me grass one blade at a time. That is the life for a capybara.

14. When we go out, people often mistake me for other animals. The most common misidentifications are: wombat, tapir, potbelly pig and javelina. One person asked if I was a guinea pig who had been exposed to radiation. Yet even a toddler barely able to talk called me a "giant mouse." I don't know how he even knew I was a rodent.

15. When my owner leaves for work, I run down to the corner of the yard and eep for her pitifully. Usually she stops the car and gives me a little treat. But she still leaves, which is wrong of her.

16. I am a picky eater. Some of my favorite foods that I will no longer eat are: yogurt drops, corn-on-the-cob, lettuce, frosted mini-wheats and craizens. Soon there won't be anything for my owner to feed me.

17. I like to eat ice but only after it has been seeped in Diet Coke. Whenever I see my owner drinking a Diet Coke in a glass, I jump up and put my paws on her lap and beg for the ice. She has taken to drinking her cokes with ice just to please me.

18. I have a small tuft of long hairs right between my ears. I think it makes me unique except I'm not sure that all capybaras don't have that.

19. My owner wrote a book about a cat and a capybara. She got a literary agent but the book hasn't sold to a publisher yet. She is thinking of self-publishing so that it will be out in time for my Animal Planet appearance. The capybara in the book is a girl and its name is Caplynn Rous.

20. When I was a baby, my owner thought I was a girl. She didn't find out until I was about four months old that I am a boy.

21. I like to go on long walks on the property. By long I mean time not distance. I am not a fast animal. When we go on walks my owner lets me choose the speed and direction. I wish the drought would end so there would be more interesting things to eat while we're walking. And maybe I could swim in the creek again. That would be heaven.

22. One time when we were walking I almost stepped on a coachwhip snake. My owner says I'm afraid of snakes but that snake didn't scare me. I don't know why.

23. I like to go for rides in the car, especially now that we have a new red car that I look really good in. I stick my nose out the window when I can but my owner mostly keeps it rolled up because she's afraid I'll jump.

24. There are only two people in the world that I hate: Carol and Philip. Philip is my owner's son. One day he stomped his feet at me and this brought out my territorial instincts. I can't seem to get over that. I don't know why I hate Carol.

25. I bit my owner once but I would NEVER do that again. Probably. I mean, you're never supposed to say never, right?